It was ass-whipping of the winter. The Scene: ten feet of pure,
ball-wrenching Pipe. Out there, exactly 80 surfers climbed over one
another for sets while, shoulder-to-shoulder, photographers stood
behind 100 tripods burning a king's ransom of Fuji Velvia. Braden Dias
was there occupying his usual spot at the top of the food chain.
Business as usual.
Then some poor, mad fool really blew it.
There are some people you absolutely do not drop in on, or even paddle
for the same wave as, at Pipeline and Braden is one of those people.
This ding-dong, a Brazilian, didn't do his homework. On an eight-foot
beast, the dude stuffed the shit out of Braden, taking off as Braden
negotiated a thick barrel. A frenzy erupted at the beachfront Volcom
house. The infamous whistle began blowing, indicating a major foul in
the lineup. Kala and some other guys bolted from the Volcom house and
dragged the guy out of the shorebreak. The man's eyes were popping out
of his head. He begged for mercy. Not today, dude. Kala, who'd been
watching some professional wrestling on pay TV, picked the guy up and
slammed him to the sand twice. Then he put the hurt on him with a
haymaker punch that launched the guy off his feet and back into the
sand. Photographers ate it up (although Kala later called every
magazine and told them not to run anything). Tourists were horrified.
Standing on the beach ready to paddle out, I suddenly had reservations
about entering the brutal arena. But, you know what? The rest of the
year I didn't see too many drop-ins at Pipeline. Seems the sacrificial
lamb let everybody know the repercussions of a stuffing on one of the
boys. Says Kala of the episode: "I just want people to know that I have
nothing against Brazilians. I just have a problem with stupid people
who endanger my friends." Are you gonna argue with that? Physically,
Kala is not a big guy. He stands a couple of inches under six feet and
hits the scales at 75 kgs. Packed onto that frame, however, is a
network of cabled sinew and muscle and a rock-like attitude that comes
straight from the volcanoes that formed the Hawai'ian Islands. Covered
in traditional and non-traditional tattoos alike, he is an imposing
figure. But it's not the tattoos that do it. It's his jet black eyes.
The guy has a glare that weakens the knees and causes butterflies in
the stomach. Paddle out at V-Land and hassle him for a wave if you
don't believe me. I used to have an irrational fear of Kala Alexander.
Irrational because he was always polite when I saw him around the North
Shore. Whether it was working the door at house parties making sure
everybody was having a good time, running the show at the infamous
Volcom house, or clearing the lineup of kooks and idiots at Pipeline,
Kala was cool. But there was that one time... It was early in the
morning, in the alley between Pipeline and Ehukai, the first day of the
Hansen Energy Pro held at Pipe. Because Pipe was lCHo-12-feet plus and
looking absolutely deadly, you could feel the tension and apprehension
in the air. Johnny Boy Gomes, head shaven and weighing-in close to
120kg was pacing around glaring at anybody who worked up the nerve to
look at him. The vibe was heavy. Coming down the road I saw what I
thought was my friend's car and I made a weird face at him - you know,
breaking the ice, lightening up the mood on such a crazy day. I should
have known by the tinted windows and Da Hui stickers that it wasn't
Benji's car, but that of the main enforcer on the North Shore, someone
who you don't make a stupid face at - Kala Alexander. Kala hit the
brakes and started screaming.
"What, you motherfucker? What are you lookin' at?" I walked faster, hid
behind a tree, took off my shirt, switched my hat around and didn't
look back. Luckily for me, he had a heat coming up and didn't have time
to reach into my chest and tear out my palpitating heart.
Enforcers are nothing new in Hawai'i or anywhere else in the world
where the waves are good enough to fight over. You know the names:
Johnny Boy, Dane Kealoha, Sunny, the list goes on, filled with guys you
don't fuck with. Without these types, waves like Pipeline, crowded and
dangerous enough as it is, would be infested with delusional beginners,
wankers, and wannabes. Enforcers are necessary, so we may as well learn
how to live with 'em.
I recorded this interview at the US Open in Huntington Beach, California, where silicone titties, pit bulls, skinheads and other dregs of California society meet the surf. World Champ Andy Irons, normally bothered by my pestering, got this huge smile on his face when I told him I was doing a Kala interview. Perhaps Andy said it best. "Kala is a good guy to have on your side".
When were you born?
March 20th, 1969. The year of the biggest swell ever.
Where do you live?
I live in Eddie Rothman's (original North Shore enforcer) guest
house. I live right below Kaiborg (fellow Kauai boy and heavyweight
jui-jitsu fighter Kai Garcia). in the Sunset Beach area.
So, you guys don't get messed with much over there?
Exactly. Nobody fucks around in our neighborhood. Eddie and Makua
live in the front house and you don't wanna fuck with them. We've got a
pretty heavy neighborhood and we got it locked down.
How did the Kauai boys take over the North Shore?
Over in Oahu. it's glamour. People are getting sponsored, there's
groupies and shit. We grew up in Kauai and we do it because we love it.
So we're hungry. We come over to Oahu and we see all this free product,
all this shit, and we're just blown away and take full advantage of it.
Our mentality is just more tough, more hungry, more real. We'd be
surfing if there was no money, no cameras, no chicks. That's why I
think Bruce and Andy are just killing it, because it's what they love
to do. We come over to Oahu and we're like kids in a candy store, it's
like Hollywood. We stand by our principles. We're not posers, not to
say guys in Qahu are posers, it's just so mainstream. Maybe it's
something in the air or the water. All my friends are nuts. All my
Kauai boys are really tapped out.
I would have to agree.
You haven't met 'em all yet, Justin. Shit bra, there's some pretty
crazy fuckers over there. And you know what? There's some more coming.
This winter is gonna be nuts.
So, you're the team captain for Da Hui?
Yes, I'm the team captain for Da Hui. the most notorious surf gang in the islands (half joking/mostly serious).
Do you remember your first fight?
One of the first fights I remember was probably in the second
grade. This kid was twice as big as me and I think he cut in line or
something. We didn't have much growing up, we were poor. Because of
that, I had a low opinion of myself, so I didn't care if I won or lost.
I would just fight. But I got good at it because of that attitude and
got in more rights and got more experience. Next thing you know, I was
good at it so I wasn't afraid of too many people. I prefer to go out
and have a good time, meet some fine young ladies you know, have a good
night. But somebody has to step up when it counts, especially if my
friends are in trouble or somebody is jeopardising their safety. I'm
not gonna hold back.
Has that kind of mentality ever landed you in any kind of trouble?
Yeah, a little bit. But I've found that as long as you're right, a
lot of times things work out. I'm still learning to be more disciplined
as a person. Everybody is still learning. Every day of your life you
learn. I make mistakes, but right now I don't have anything over my
head - I don't have any court cases. I'm just out there trying to
support my kids. I give everybody a chance.
Full Article in Stab Magazine - Issue 01 - March / April 2004
Story by Justin Cote.
Posts: 4615
Reply #4615 on : Wed November 26, 2008, 11:03:53