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Matt Herbert

Matt Herbert Writer

Gerbils do not like vegimite

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Votes last round 24

  • 2533, NSW
  • 16
  • My Inspiration would definatly be the lush water that caresses me when i surf
  • A vietnamese guy who tried to sell me marajuana
  • I have no imagination
  • When i was first able to hold a pencil
  • To take pictures of the ground
  • Stab, Tracks and Surfing life...
  • When i was like 3 i was scared of a prey mantis cause i thought it might eat me
  • Exuberantly ridiculous
  • Tasmania will sink
  • Extremely vibrant
 
 

Stories from my pocket

CHESLIN THE SAND BEAST

The tide turns and the waves spill but Cheslin is there, waiting. 

Surfers ride waves as the current pulls but Cheslin is still there, waiting.

He pulls you in with his deadly smell. The wafting sent of feather dreams drifting through the cranium and into your lungs. The ghastly sifted sand beast gently travels up to lurch onto your board. Then all is still, the dogs have now resided over the crescent moon. Flimsily Cheslin takes his own mushrooms and volleys them towards the clams. The peanut butter incident has now been resolved.

So when you're out in a lul awaiting your next wave, spare a thought for Cheslin the sand beast.

 

WILBUR MAY NOT LIVE

The first day i saw Wilbur was a day of no other. Songbirds were singing synonyms and playing rough on the gym set. Everybody was happy and touching grapes. The bristles on my eyes stung no more. 

But the crazy thing was that no one had eaten the rabbits lunch order. Now the rabbits were forced to travel down slippery dips into the deep haze of forgiveness. Only Cheese shredings could save them from the oblong shaped apple.

To everyone's dismay the rabbits never found the cheese king and this forced them into a spiral of secure poverty.

That my friends is the story of Wilbur

 

THE EXTRA SPECIAL POSH WORD

Sir Cranium Duffldorf is the product manager for his company. He likes to run, swim and play with old needles.

While playing with old needles one day it went through his finger. So he got up and said furtznugen 17 times. This made no change in the situation.

The increasingly experienced banana man was the top of his league when Sir Duffldorf arranged a meating with him. This made all the moonshine people VERY angry in knowing what the dorf man could do. It took 17 olompagons to discover the secret of that faithful afternoon. Exuberance was spilt everywhere!

Meanwhile back near Maxwell Sparrow the oddest fete of manly hood was starting to engulf around his ankles. But luckily to his divine sense of triganometry he managed to legislate the words of the banana man. To his dismay a bird had done poo all over his evening gown. They then ate the bird.

Trying to figure out what made sense at all, Mr Duffldorf continually furiously ate his own sweater. This made him intensely humid so Jamal made the most petique mango pudding.

 

 

 

THE SERIOUS SITUATION

The seriousness of this situation was indeed VERY exclusive. It needed no time for delay and disputed every type of salt. Trying hard to think of a new way to dance, Lady Fitzpatric decided to proceed into the deep silvery blue of the oceans surface. Calm translucent wafts of fine mist drifted slowly into her nostrils. Incandescent candles shone so brightly that all the doid bodyboarders were forced to leave. Party was celebrated in every cavern. 

But this was not the end to the story as only half light shown onto the waves. This cause the trinomial extinction of ALL sea crabs. Their warty hide with see through legs would never be seen by naked eyes again. 

It's easter cried Gerold the old man. But no one listened because he enjoys windows. 

Conspire was sought after throughout the day and although only 13 people could get this much publicity they still bought shiny spoons. 

This now concludes the 5 miracles that have obscurely outstretched our world.


Views: 301
 
 
  • Krystle Wright
    Posted by Krystle Wright on May 5, 2009

    Love the giant pencil haha gold! Quality work too, stabs. If u got a spare moment, please check out my work :)

  • mia seitz
    Posted by mia seitz on May 3, 2009

    good luck boy :) stabs, stab back please :)x

  • Emillie-JEan Bisgrove-Cole
    Posted by Emillie-JEan Bisgrove-Cole on May 2, 2009

    now that one awesome pencil!!! love it!!!! hilarious!!! ahaha stabbss for sure!!stabs back?

  • Skyee Groth
    Posted by Skyee Groth on May 2, 2009

    stabed you stab us back? xx

  • Mollie Flynn
    Posted by Mollie Flynn on May 2, 2009

    Why thank you :)

  • Sophie Basham
    Posted by Sophie Basham on May 2, 2009

    good luck in round 2 (: hit us backk

  • Mollie Flynn
    Posted by Mollie Flynn on May 2, 2009

    stabed stabs back :) good luck

  • Clare H
    Posted by Clare H on May 2, 2009

    good luck matt! stab :) hit us back

  • Sophie Basham
    Posted by Sophie Basham on April 22, 2009

    doing heaps well (: stabbs back ?

  • kathryn nojin
    Posted by kathryn nojin on April 21, 2009

    stab for stab please!

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